TMT: It’s easy to start a conversation in a social setting, here are 13 ways to do so

13 ways to ease the tension and get the conversation flowing!

1. Introduction: Introduce yourself by your first name, and state how you know the host. Ex: “Hello, I’m Nicole, it’s nice to meet you. [Their reply]. How do you know [insert name]? [Their reply]. Oh interesting! I met them at…”
2. Compliment: Compliments are an easy way to get someone’s guard down and make them likely to like you. Something as simple as complimenting a someone on their outfit can be a great way to start a conversation. You can proceed to ask them more such as about their style, where they shop, etcetera. This applies to most compliments (such as a compliment on someone’s makeup in which you can ask how long it took them to do it, etc.).
3. Common Interests: If you overhear someone talking about a subject you are interested in, you can join in and say “I couldn’t help but overhear your conversation about [topic]. I’m interested in that subject… (Ex: I’ve been playing volleyball since middle school, I’ve traveled there as well and love the culture, I studied nearby for my undergrad, I’ve tried perfecting that recipe to no avail). Remember to be respectful when joining the conversation and do not act intrusive. Read people’s body language as well to see if they are comfortable with you joining the conversation.
4. Question about location, menu item, etc.: This is definitely one of the easier options. If you are at a restaurant or bar, you can ask someone if they’ve been there before or have any food or drink recommendations. Even if they haven’t, you can joke with them about what sounds good on the menu! Or if you’re at a bar you can joke and say you dislike a certain drink, so you will be ordering anything but that.
5. Observation: Let’s start with an example. Ex: “I noticed you’re wearing shoes from the Prada Fall 2019 collection! I love them. Are you interested in fashion, because you have great taste!” Though this often requires you to have previous knowledge in a subject, you can also make an observation such as noticing that they are good at playing a sport or game, that they enjoy a particular meal, etc. This is a great way to discuss mutual interests and foster a connection.
6. Current Events: This topic may be slightly difficult to discuss, as you wouldn’t want to talk about sensitive subjects such as politics. However, you can talk about lighthearted topics such as the Olympics. Asking simple questions, like, “Have you watched the Italy vs Spain soccer game? What did you think about it?” or even, “Which team are you rooting for?” can be easy ways to start a conversation with a stranger.
7. Asking for an opinion: Most people enjoy when others look to them for advice. I think that an easy way to do this (usually for girls) at a party is by asking, “Hey, do you think [insert subject]?” Often times it’s easy for girls to meet in the washroom at a party and ask, “Does this perfume smell overpowering,” or “Does this lipstick match my look?” This might be difficult for most men, but there’s a good chance it will work!
8. Mutual Connection: If someone you know is talking to an unfamiliar face, you can ask to be introduced to them. Pretty darn simple!
9. Shared Experience: Say hello to someone and begin the conversation by sharing something about yourself, such as a hobby or favorite destination. Then, allow them to build on what you said, and hopefully you find something you both have in common! Additionally, if you hear them say something about themselves that you relate to, join in and share your experience!
10. Praise for an Accomplishment: This works particularly well when a person’s achievements are openly discussed in that setting. Whether you go to a party where they are being celebrated, or you heard someone congratulate them on something like opening a business, this is a good way to show interest in them and allow them to share things about themselves. You can ask questions (don’t come across as nosy!) to show your interest in what they have to say.
11. Recommendation (Restaurant, Book, Movie): Recommending your favorite things to others is another way to get the conversation flowing. You can describe the new Thai restaurant you just ate at down the block, or an exciting thriller you watched a few days ago.
12. Offering help: If a person is involved in an activity (let’s say you are at a house party and they are placing dishes on the table), offering them help shows that you are polite and open. This is an incentive for them to ask you your name and begin conversing.
13. Humor: If you’re in a group conversation where you haven’t met the individuals personally, being witty and funny is a great way to get people to let their guard down. Laughing at someone else’s jokes and asking them to go into more detail is a smart way to make a new friend.

Well ladies and gents, next time you are in a social setting, try these out! Let me know if you have any more tips in the comments, or if these worked for you! ✌️Peace, Nicole.